13 years ago tomorrow was the worst day of my life!
My mom was killed in a car accident on November 19, 1998 at 3:19 p.m.
My mom was my best friend.
13 years is a long time. My gosh, I was a sophomore in high school. It’s remarkable to think about how much has happened during those years! I was thinking as I was driving home from work last night—how different my life would have been—and how much better it would be now if I had my mom around.
The only thing in life I didn’t want to lose—I lost—and the only think I lost that I want back, I can’t have. Boy is that a terrible feeling! If you lost someone that close to you than you already know—I mean the, they are still here with you, they are in Heaven watching and supporting you, they are in a better place, those words, those phrases they are nice—they help, but it really isn't the same; as the years pass you come to an understanding that all of this, this life, will never really be the same.
But boy have I’ve been fortunate though. I’ve had a grandma (my mom’s mom) who has stepped in and filled that void pretty well. I taught piano from age 15-24, those moms were sure nice to me and many of them treated me like I was their own son. I learned how to cook, sew and do domesticated things from those women who really were saviors! As I got older and transition from teaching piano into television I had a new set of moms—the ones who would take notice of me on TV and wrap their arms around me—from my grandma in Alpena, Patty Schmezle in Topeka and Leisha Beard in Joplin I had women that I called Ma and that treated me like an extra son. I know I could call any of those ladies right now—and they would do anything for me. I love them for that.
When I read the news or when I report on a tragic story, I have this life experience that always reminds me that the fatality I’m reporting on is someone just like my mom, they are loved and they are going to be missed. Each day in my business there are moms and daughters and dads and sons that die—lives changed forever and years, beyond years effected. Isn’t it strange though, I mean, I’m 29 years old and I have quite a few of my friends—my age that have still never lost anyone close to them. Some of us slide through live with such little loss and others seem to lose it all.
I’m thankful to my father, I’m blessed by my grandmother and I’m fortunate to have so many of you that care. Those days of wanting to give up are far behind—but there are still days were those little pick-me-up are nice that so many of you offer that to me.
Many would ask, why share something so personal about yourself. That answer is simple, I want you too know that I'm just like you. I have similar struggles and I too have been impacted by a sudden change in my life. It's not always easy to talk about-but you hope it touches someones heart.
13 years has come and gone too fast.
As cliché as it may sounds—it sure would be nice to hear her voice one more time, just to hear her say one sentence—Bri I love you and I’m proud of you.
When I get to heaven, that's all I want to hear.